He Liked watching. From his little chair at his desk in the dorm room at Harvard, observing as hundreds and then thousands of students logged in and started doing things and he could see all of it. He Liked to see what pictures they clicked. He Liked to watch them send messages to friends. He Liked to watch which links they clicked, and he Liked to follow as they browsed bean bag chairs and clamp lamps and vibrators…
He Liked to see it all. Every time they clicked an ex-boyfriend’s profile, stopped on their old babysitter’s picture, every time they drifted towards the box to message that girl from chem lab even while their girlfriend was asleep six feet away, he saw it. He Liked seeing it…
And they like him too, don’t they? He connects them, after all. He connects new friends. He connects school mates. He connects coworkers, acquaintances, people who met at the dog park, the parents at the preschool, the trainer at the gym…
They told him he could watch, so it’s not wrong, is it? They knew he Liked watching, and they kept coming, more and more of them. He Liked to make things better. Watching let him make things, didn’t it? They liked it when he watched. He was sure they liked it. He could only show them what they liked when he watched…
It’s not wrong that he Likes watching. So he watches. What pictures they stop on. When their phones were near other phones. Who they texted with. Who they walked by. What stores they went into. How they spent a lot of time in the baby clothes section. How they kept leaving his site to go to the fertility website…
It’s not creepy. It’s nice. Don’t you like to be connected? He Likes to connect you. He can only do it if he watches…
But when you put down your phone, there’s so much he still can’t see. He needs to see what you see, so he can connect you with what you like. So he gives you magic glasses so he can see what you see.
They’re for you, of course, don’t you like them? Only you can see through them. You and the workers he hires in Kenya to watch. And the AI he’s training. But it’s all so he can show you more of what you like. Don’t you like that? He can see that you paused an extra half second when you saw that billboard for a watch. He can show you where to buy that watch. He sees that you lingered on the pants in the shop window. He can show you where those pants are on sale. You looked back twice at the pretty girl at the squat rack in the gym. He can tell you her name, where she works, her home address. He can connect you to what you like, because he Likes to connect you.
Is it wrong for him to Like watching? It makes the site better! It keeps you connected! You’ll always get more of what you like as long as you like being connected to him!
Peering Mark
The compulsion gripped him early. Watching, from his little chair at his desk in the dorm room at Harvard, observing as hundreds and then thousands of students logged in and started doing things and he could see all of it, in real time. He could see them clicking on pictures. He could see them sending messages to friends. He could see them when they followed links to bean bag chairs and clamp lamps and vibrators.
Every little moment, every movement, every time their mouse hovered over the link to their ex-boyfriend’s profile, or their old babysitter’s picture, every time they drifted towards the box to message that girl from chem lab even while their girlfriend was asleep six feet away, Mark saw it. He liked seeing it. No – he loved seeing it. It felt so… delicious. Forbidden. Dirty in all the right ways.
But it wasn’t bad, was it? They were using his site, after all, and they all knew he watched everything they did, so the more they used his site, the more it seemed they approved of him watching. Watching everything. Watching made the site better, didn’t it? Watching made them like it more. They liked using it. They liked it when he watched. He was sure they liked it. They wanted him to watch them. They loved being watched. He was just doing what they loved, watching them carefully, watching them while they scrolled his site on their phone while they sat on the toilet in their bathroom liking posts about taking a trip to Tokyo and Mark liked to watch everything they did while they scrolled on the toilet. Is that ok with you? As long as he’s connected you. He’s keeping you connected. He likes to keep you connected (and he likes to watch).
He was just connecting people. He connected old friends. He connected new friends. He connected school mates. He connected teachers and students. He connected coworkers, acquaintances, people you met on line, new friends at the dog park, old friends at the dog park, the parents at your preschool, the trainer at the gym, the guy on the treadmill at the gym, the woman in the locker room at the gym, the man who stood uncomfortably next to you at the weight rack in the gym, the woman who followed you out to your car at the gym, the woman who jumped on your car as you tried to drive away from the gym, he connected the police man who came to take the statement from you about the stalker at the gym. He connected families. He connected cousins. He connected women running from abuse with the spouses who abused them. He connected all of them and he could do it because he was always always always watching, watching everything they did, watching when their phones were near other phones, watching who they were near, watching who they texted with, watching who they lingered over, watching who they walked by, watching whose phone was close to their phone, watching what stores they went into, watching how they spent a lot of time in the baby clothes section even though they weren’t pregnant yet, watching how they kept leaving his site to go to the fertility website, watching how they followed the pregnant influencer, watching how they lingered over pictures of pregnant women, watching every last little thing that they did, is that wrong? Is it wrong for Mark to enjoy watching it all? It makes the site better! It keeps you connected! And most of all you will always be completely and totally connected to Mark!
The Liker is just a scary story kids tell around the campfire. A creepy joke in the back of a satire magazine. But the real Mark Zuckerberg is far scarier than you can imagine.